Decorating Day

 Do you ever have one of those days where you've planned everything out in your mind to be just so, and it's going to be a wonderful, magical day full of family memories that will be treasured for a lifetime, and then it's just, well, so NOT that.

That was my day yesterday.  Or at least the first part of my day.  

I'd been working all week towards Friday being our Christmas decorating day and was SO proud of myself as I don't think I've ever managed to decorate for Christmas before December 1.  But the fact that we kind of had an extra buffer week thrown in there between Thanksgiving and December gave me a little room to work with.  So I had a plan.  The Christmas footlockers were down from the top of the closets and brought in from a friends' storage closet that she so generously allowed us to use and we were ready.  Jason had an all day conference Friday and Saturday (that's our weekend here), but I was actually very much looking forward to a day home with the girls on Friday, staying in PJ's, drinking hot chocolate, listening to Christmas music, decorating the tree etc. etc.  The plan was to get most of the preliminary decorating stuff done and then when Jason got home we could finish off the tree, drink more hot chocolate maybe watch a good Christmas movie, sing Kumbayah and go to bed.  You get the idea.  Picture perfect day.  In my head.  

Then Friday morning came and I woke up.

Jason left early to get to his meeting, Maddie got up with Anabelle and I got to sleep in until 9.  Should be the perfect start to the perfect day, right?  Well for whatever reason I woke up very grumpy, and even though I got to sleep in, waking up to my house looking like a hurricane hit was not great.  The girls are usually great about getting chores done and cleaning up but not this particular day.  Didn't sit well with me, and I will confess that I didn't react very well.  Which led to us all having a mammoth case of the grumpies as we cleaned up in order to get ready for hurricane Christmas to hit once we opened the footlockers.   I huddled the girls up, called a truce, apologized for being so grumpy, explained that I was just trying to make this day extra special and fun and we all agreed to start over.  

I now as I'm writing this, I can't even really remembered specific things that happened, I just know that it was NOT turning out like the picture perfect day that was in my head.  

Anyway, we finished chores, got Anabelle down for her nap, and were finally ready to start decorating the tree and house.  The girls starting unpacking and sorting our artificial tree...

Only to discover that the center pole for the tree was missing.  AGHHH!  I called my friend who stored it for me and she was actually free and offered to drive me out and see if we could find it in her storage area.  Bless her.  I think she could tell that i was on the verge of a breakdown for a reason that I'm realizing I can't even really begin to describe...  (have I mentioned that Anabelle really has not slept this week and I am way sleep deprived so maybe that explains my fragile emotional state).  Anyway.

Pole found.  Crisis averted.  

Another round of apologies from mom to girls for her irrational, highly emotional state.  We actually even sat down and prayed together for the Christmas season in our home and the hope that as a family we will keep the real meaning in front of us.    And the day really improved from there!  Jason even came home early from his meeting and got to join in the tree decorating fun.  

Anabelle was WAY excited about the Christmas tree when she woke up from her nap.

So the Cox home is now ready to usher in the Christmas season!

Yes, our Christmas stockings are way pitiful.  Every year I've said I'm going to make them and I never have.  Maybe it will happen this year but considering it's December 1st, I probably shouldn't count on it!

I love my Fontanini nativity.  If I lived in the states I would probably add a lot more to it, but it's not something I ever remember to get.  I do want a more kid friendly nativity and almost ordered one this year but then, well, I didn't.  Maybe next year.

 Now that we live in Jordan, I really want to get a natural olive wood nativity.  They are beautiful and I would love to add that to our Christmas decor.

We also have this fun nativity from Jason's childhood in West Africa.  If you look at it closely it has some really interesting weird pieces...

I've never been able to identify Mary, and quite frankly Baby Jesus looks like a dying martian.  Or E.T.  

So despite the rocky, emotional start to the day (shocking in this house full of women!), our house is now decorated and we made lots of fun memories.  Even got Abbey out the door to a school dance (that I'd forgotten about thus creating some of the stress mid- day as we weathered an "outfit crisis") by 4:30 and she still participated in all the tree decorating.  

AND, I am officially ready to begin our Jesse Tree TODAY, DECEMBER 1!   That means I have at least 1 ornament done and the tree to hang it on and hopefully this year I'll stay a little ahead of the curve and we'll be able to complete it!  

Merry Christmas Season to all!

Entrusted

Entrust:  To commit to another with confidence

Yes, I'm back to this.  If you read my rambling post from a few weeks ago, I warned you that I was processing!  Still am.  Thinking and praying about what God has entrusted me with and what that really means.  I mean look at that definition.  Does it scare you a little bit like it does me to think that the creator of this universe has "committed (insert whatever thing here) to me with confidence"?!?!  I mean does He KNOW me?  (yes)  Is He CRAZY?!  (strangely no...)

Here's where I've been- the parable of the talents.  The master returns to collect what he's entrusted from His servants.

"'Master', he said, 'you entrusted me with five talents.  See, I have gained five more.' His master replied, 'Well done, good and faithful servant!  You have been faithful with a few things; I will put you in charge of many things.  Come and share your master's happiness!"

Matthew 25:20-21

As I've meditated on this passage over the past several weeks, God has brought other things along for me to consider.  In my Experiencing God  Day by Day devotional book, I read these words:

 "Your ability to serve God is not based on your past, but on your faithfulness today.  If you are faithful with the task God entrusts to you, God will enable you to accomplish it."  (see, there's that "today" theme again!) 

 Let me just tell you that I have a very unique ability (that I've passed on to at least 2 of my 4 daughters) to worry like nobody's business.  That in itself is a topic of another post, but take it from me, in the world of worry, I can beat you hands down.  I promise.  God knows this and He knows how quickly I can become overwhelmed as I consider the tasks of mothering, providing for our family, being the wife I desire to be.  For all these reasons, I am so thankful for this theme He has me camping on in this season!  Because, truly, life is simply overwhelming.  The tasks at hand always seem to big. Raising 4 daughters to be women who fear the Lord and desire to serve Him- well that's just too much for me!  Thankfully, not too much for God.  He gives me bite-sized, today-sized pieces which is about all I can handle.  He calls me to be faithful with today's task and today's task only- whatever that may be.   Am I being faithful in prayer?  in personal discipleship and discipleship of my kids?  in preparation for whatever tomorrow holds as He directs? 

See, as a world class worrier, even in my prayer time, I can quickly go from praising Him for His provisions for the daily task at hand to fretting over this or that and thinking "I JUST CAN'T DO IT!!!".  And always, always, always, He is so faithful.  Here's what He reminded me of on Thankgiving morning...

"And God is able to make all grace abound to you, so that in all things at all times, having all that you need, you will abound in every good work."

2 Corinthians 9:8  

HE is the one who gives me what I need for the task that He's given me.  And not just sometimes for some of the tasks.  No, IN all things AT all times, His grace will provide ALL I need.  

I've also been reading Paul's letters.  This jumped out at me...

"So then, men ought to regard us as servants of Christ and as those entrusted with the secret things of God.  Now it is required that those who have been given a trust must prove faithful.  I care very little if I am judged by you or by any human court; indeed, I do not even judge myself.  My conscience is clear, but that does not make me innocent.  It is the Lord who judges me.  Therefore judge nothing before the appointed time; wait till the Lord comes.  He will bring to light what is hidden in darkness and will expose the motives of men's hearts.  At that time each will receive his praise from God."

Holy cow!  It's overwhelming enough to think of my precious little ones that I've been entrusted with (that's mainly how I've felt led to apply the  Matthew passage to my life at this point), but to move on from that and realize that as a believer, I am entrusted with the "secret things of God"!  Good grief.  How unworthy am I!  Thankfully God does not expect my worthiness.   No, He knows how ridiculously unworthy I am, yet by His amazing grace He chooses to entrust me anyway.   He does, however, expect my faithfulness.  And as the above passage says, my judgment ultimately comes from Him alone.  He alone knows my heart and my true motives. When it's all said and done, from the daily mothering tasks and ins and outs of running a household to the challenges of learning and communicating in Arabic to being what Jason needs to support him in his work,  may I prove faithful and seek the praise of Christ alone!  

An Overseas Thankgiving

 For me, Thanksgiving is the hardest overseas holiday.  Probably because it is really not recognized in any form- and why should it be, I guess?  But at least for Christmas and Easter, even in the Middle East, there are many who recognize and celebrate these major holidays- not so with Thanksgiving.  Last year, I was not in such a great place spiritually and I actually found myself quite grumpy about the whole thing.  I was extremely annoyed with everyone's daily Thanksgiving posts on Facebook.   I was pretty much the grinch of Thanksgiving.  But I did better this year.  It's still somewhat bitter sweet to be away from extended family during the holidays, but we try very hard to create our own family traditions and memories with the girls and make the time special

This year, not only did I get over my grinch like spirit with the whole "today I am thankful for" thing, I even had the girls make a thankful tree for us.  I do try and help us get beyond being thankful for family, friends, God, food- all the typical things.  Yes, of course we are thankful for those things, but I want a little more umph behind our "thankfuls".  

We celebrate each year with a group of ex-pats that we have a home fellowship with and we usually do that on Friday.  Well, I just can't let Thursday go by unrecognized.  That and the fact that my husband wants us to have our very own Thankgiving leftovers has led to us doing our own Thankgiving meal with our family and sometimes a few others on Thanksgiving day itself.  This year we had some new friends come celebrate with us.  We surprised the girls Thursday morning be letting them skip school so we ALL got to sleep in which was nice.  Because I had already done most of our cooking earlier in the week causing my kitchen to look like this...

but resulting in THIS yumminess (among other things)

Anyway, since I'd done most of the work earlier in the week, we were able to relax (ish) on Thursday and just enjoy family time.  

Maddie and Naomi set and decorated the table and even made place cards for everyone. 

The set up of our apartment at this point does not allow for a dining room table.  We have a kitchen table that pulls out into a big square so that works for now.  In most countries in the Middle East you can find beautiful handmade tablecloths like the one below from Syria.  I found this one on a recent trip to Lebanon and loved the multi-colored pattern.  The brown accent napkins go with another table cloth that I have but it's for a long dining room style table so for now I just use the napkins.

To digress for a minute.  We had some friends over on Saturday night for Thanksgiving leftovers and this time I used one of my other Syrian tablecloths.  This is one I also bought years ago in Lebanon for my dining room table, but it got bleach spilled on half of it, so my wonderful Memommy cut it in half for me and finished it off and now it fits perfectly on my square table.  I love the way it looks with our feista dishes!

Anyway, back to Thanksgiving.  We had a Pioneer Woman/Memommy Thanksgiving dinner, at least that's where most of my recipes came from.  

I brined my turkey using this recipe from Pioneer Woman.  To go with it, we also had:

Memommy's dressing

Memommy's rolls (pictured above)

Memommy's sweet potato casserole

cranberry sauce with horseradish and dijon

broccoli salad

PW's green bean casserole

mashed potatoes

PW's pumpkin butter

strawberry pretzel layered jello salad

Memommy's pumpkin pie

Oh, and I almost forgot.  This year we have a satellite that gets American channels in real time so we got to watch the Macy's parade live- yay!  So, I just had to make an appetizer to go along with parade watching before dinner.  

I found this recipe for baked brie with cranberries and pecans and it was AMAZING!

 Digging in..

Turkey carving!

Mia' favorite part...

Jason also upped our satellite for the next few months so that he can catch the end of football season and so we can watch college basketball and NBA.  So excited that we finally get sports on our TV and don't have to worry about whether or not the internet will be working.  Course we'll still have to get up at 3 AM for some games.  Let's hope it's worth it this year!  Go Tigers Go! 

So another overseas Thanksgiving has come and gone, and despite missing our extended family, our time together with our family here, reminded us once again of how very much we have to be thankful for.  God led me to a Scripture earlier this week that I'm certain I've read before, but never in light of Thanksgiving.  It talks about how as the grace of God reaches more and more people, thanksgiving will overflow to the glory of God.  One of the commentaries I read stated that with God, what begins with His grace, leads to His glory.  I love that, and it is my prayer this holiday season.  That more and more will come into His presence, saved by His grace, and that as more come, thanksgiving will overflow to the glory of God.  Isn't that what it's all about, anyway?

"All this is for your benefit, so that the grace that is reaching more and more people may cause thanksgiving to overflow to the glory of God."

2 Corinthians 4:15

Things only a TCK (third culture kid) would say...

Third Culture Kids:

 A unique group of people

Kids whose parents are from one culture, but are raising them in another culture so they are stuck somewhere in between - their own third culture so to speak

Being married to one of these and raising 4 of my own, I have a special love for this unique group and the way their little minds work.  

Thought you'd enjoy some of these quotes that are unique to this special group!  

"Mom, what does USA stand for?"

"Mom, I don't like those round, brown cookies you put in my lunch"  (that would be OREOS!!)

"Wait, you mean George Washington is not still president?!"

"Home DepoT" (with the "T" pronounced)

"Mom, which America is Memphis in?"

"Mom, why do people in America think that it matters if you have brown skin or black skin or white skin?"

"Mom,  I'm not white, I'm kind of peachy colored, but people call me white"

"Mom, WHAT is the SEC and WHO is Ole Miss?" (after 1 week of school in the US)

"Do you think my teacher will understand English?" (before going to school in US for 1st time)

"Mom, was that a BOMB?" (during her first Memphis thunderstorm)

"Mom, WHY do I have to get IN the toilet?"  (first Memphis tornado- someone didn't understand the tornado drill...)

"Mom, LOOK, there's a bunch of open space- just go around all these cars"  (getting up on the shoulder to avoid all the interstate traffic)

"Mom, why are you STOPPING at every red light?  We never do that in Lebanon..."

"How come there aren't taxis in Memphis and Georgia?  Does everybody drive their own car?"

"Mom, why do girls here (America) think it's good for everyone to see so much of their skin?"

We're not cold...

(For another post on the refugees click HERE)

Winters in this part of the world are a strange phenomenon.  Truly.  And they come on so quickly!  Two weeks ago I was walking around in my house in shorts and a t-shirt, and within a matter of days the temperature has dropped just enough that we are now wearing layer upon layer, bundling up in blankets, and using flannel sheets and bed buddies to heat the sheets before climbing in.

It doesn't matter that the high for the day as far as outside temp might be in the 70s.  What matters is that low that creeps down into the 50s.  Combine that with apartments built of concrete and marble slab and NO insulation and literally within days the temperature IN your apartment is lower than the outside temperature and it's this weird kind of cold that creeps into your bones and won't go away.  Believe me when I tell you that you don't want to get behind the "cold curve" as we've started calling it.  Once you get behind, there's no catching up!

So turn on our heat, you say?  Nope!  Not that easy!  SOME apartments have split AC/heating units (not ours, although our landlord was kind enough to leave these lovely pipes sticking out of the walls in the kitchen, master bedroom and living room as a little extra incentive to have them put in ourselves- nice, huh?), however the cost of buying and then running said units is so astronomically high that very few do it.

There is also the option of "sobas".  Those are heaters that you can role around wherever you want that are powered by a propane tank and have flame burners on the front.  Ideal for a toddler, right?   They do work to heat the immediate area of about 3 feet around them in every direction but they aren't incredibly safe especially with little people running around.  Also, if you've been watching the news and have seen the protests taking place in our dear country, this is one of the issues.  The price of the propane tanks just went up from 6 JD to 10 JD (1 JD is about $1.40).  May not sound like a huge amount but considering most families buy at least 1 a week if not 2 or 3 depending on how many heating units they have, this can add up pretty quickly!

So I've been mentally gearing up for winter, and I confess whining a good bit in my head.  I'm not ready to feel achy for 3-4 months straight because I'm tense from shivering!  I'm somewhat grumpy about having to get up to a freezing cold house where I can literally see my breathe before we can get some sort of (probably not so safe!) heating option going.  I don't love the idea that we pretty much close off the front part of our house during the winter except for walking through to go out the door, because we just can't keep all that space heated.   I HATE having to put literally 4 layers of clothing on my toddler so that I can be assured that she won't wake up too cold during the night and she still wakes up with a freezing cold nose and fingers.  I am most assuredly not looking forward to another winter of ear infections, runny noses and colds because we are just not quite ever warm.  And on and on I went, whine, whine, whine, complain, complain, complain.

Until...

I glanced at the pile of clothes growing bigger and bigger in my bedroom as I have time to go through another closet or box of old clothes.  Jackets, sweaters, socks, tights.  Things we don't need, becasue we already have ENOUGH.  NO, TOO MUCH.

We've been setting these things aside to give to the Syrian refugees.  You can't live in this part of the world without being aware of the continuing conflict in Syria and the thousands upon thousands of men, women and children who have fled their homes to neighboring countries in many cases with little more than the clothes on their backs.  Many of these families fled in the summer time with summer clothes on their backs.  

And nothing else.

And now winter is upon us.

And they are cold.  I am not cold.  We are not cold.  

I have hot water.  They might not have any water.  

I have warm blankets and flannel sheets.  They MIGHT have a mattress on the floor.  

I have 4 layers that I can put on my toddler, and my worry is that she might wake up a little cold.  They might have 1 layer to put on their precious little ones and their worry is death from exposure.  

My girls have layer upon layer of fuzzy socks in fun colors that they put on and laugh while they play slip slide.  They might not have shoes.

So, no, we are not cold.  We are abundantly warm and abundantly rich in so many more ways than I can count.   I remind my girls to look at that growing pile of our excess that we have yet to give away when they begin to tell me they are cold, and I tell them to put on another layer.  Because they have it.  And there are so many who don't.  

"This is how we know what love is:  Jesus Christ laid down his life for us.  And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers.  If anyone has material possessions and sees his brother in need but has no pity on him, how can the love of God be in him?   Dear children, let us not love with words or tongue but with actions and in truth.  This then is how we know that we belong to the truth, and how we set our hearts at rest in his presence whenever our hearts condemn us.  For God is greater than our hearts, and he knows everything.  Dear friends, if our hearts do not condemn us, we have confidence before God and receive from him anything we ask, because we obey his commands and do what pleases him.  And this is his command: to believe in the name of his Son, Jesus Christ, and to love one another as he commanded us.  

1 John 4:16-23

**I fear that so many in the body of Christ in the US, are unaware of the refugee crisis that is threatening so many precious people here.  We live in a part of the world that is misunderstood by so many.  And misunderstanding all too often equals fear.  Unlike Haiti or various African nations or South America, these people are not easy to access and they don't reach out welcoming arms to white faced Americans.  But that doesn't make them any less needy or any less worthy of experiencing the body of Christ in action.  You can pray and you can give.  Yes, we live here so we can't NOT be aware of the crisis happening basically on our doorstep, but I want to make you aware too!   Look into the Syrian refugee crisis and what you can do to help.  Do not let your misunderstanding of these precious people cause you to fear them or even dislike them before you have prayed for God's mercies on them.  If you want more information, contact me and I can point you in the right direction.  

19 hours

That's how long we had with Daddy between trips this week.  I'm thankful he was able to come home at all!  After being gone a week, he returned Thursday morning at 10, and headed back to the airport Friday morning at 5 AM for another 4 day trip.  We made the most of our 19 hours together!

I noticed on Wednesday that our van was doing weird things when switching gears but in the 30 minute period we were in the car in stop-and-go traffic, I honestly didn't notice, THAT much.  Well, on the way to the airport Thursday morning (30-45 minutes away and you can actually go a decent speed if there's no traffic), I realized that yeah, something was definitely wrong with the car.   Jason drove on the way home so he could see what was wrong and he knew pretty quickly that something was wrong with the clutch and/or transmission. (I have no idea what I"m talking about here....).  Not wanting to take away at all from our day, I told him not to worry about getting it fixed in the short time he's home.  The girls and I would be fine with taxis, and I would see if someone could help me get it to the shop.  Well, our van had other plans.  When we were on our street (thankfully!) about 100 yards from home, it completely gave out.  Wouldn't go a bit.  We walked the rest of the way home which Anabelle especially loved and Jason arranged to have the car towed the next day.   (funny side story- at breakfast this morning, I mentioned to Maddie that I would arrange a ride for her from band practice on Monday and to please not let me forget since the car would still be in the shop, and Naomi pipes up saying, "Mommy, I thought a toad got our car".  Stinker!)

Anyway, so Anabelle liked her walk so much with Daddy (i.e. she pitched a screaming, crying fit when we walked in our apt yelling "wak wak wak") that he took all the girls back out for a walk to the neighborhood dikan (Arabic for corner convenience store that literally has EVERYTHING you could possibly need in a space the size of some American walk in closets- it may be piled to the ceiling and require a ladder to get to, but you ask for it, they get it).  So the girls and daddy went for a walk which gave me a chance to clean up a bit from the hurricane that hit our house that morning when we all overslept and then realized Daddy's plane was arriving 30 minutes early- definitely a good thing!

My plan for this day was to not have to do TOO much in the kitchen since we were planning a family fun day which in our house involves lots of games, but we couldn't go out either due to protests and the occasional riot in the city because of fuel prices and other issues (oh the fun of living in the Middle East).   Anyway, I thawed one of my frozen crockpot meals from my recent freezer cooking attempts, and we got to smell cilantro lime chicken all day while we played.

After pita pizzas for lunch, we started with the games.  First up was spoons and then Sorry in order to include Naomi.

Next, since Anabelle essentially didn't take a nap (thank you ear infecton #984) unless you count 30 minutes in bed where I'm not entirely sure that she even slept, Naomi and Anabelle watched Max and Ruby ("Mac and ruuree" in anabellese) which Jason and I played Settlers of Catan with AJ and Maddie.  If you don't know this game you should check it out- so much fun!

Jason had a few calls he had to make so while he did that I finished throwing dinner together.  I found this recipe for homemade whole wheat tortillas.  The first time I made them for buritos for the girls and fish tacos for me (earlier this week), they were really good, but I think the whole wheat flour I used was a bit too coarse or something this time.  Although the flavor was really good, the texture was not quite right, and the shape was, well, awful.  Would still recommend the recipe, though- pretty sure my problems were due to user error.  

Anyway, while I cooked and Jason got a few things done, Maddie and Naomi crafted.   Here's a look at some of the beautiful candles Maddie and Naomi made with some glass jars I had sitting around...

Abbey and Anabelle played AB's new favorite game-"high seek"

We enjoyed our yummy Mexican feast.  I also threw together an apple cake for dessert.  I've been dieting and decided this was a cheat day and I wanted to bake for my hubby during his one day home.  Here's this amazingly yummy and quick to throw together recipe.  It's made from stuff you probably already have on hand.  

After dinner it was time for family movie night!  This can be a challenge when the movie viewers range in age from 6 to 13, but thankfully (after a somewhat LONG process), big sisters were gracious and let Naomi do most of the deciding. 

The original Parent Trap- classic.

Naomi got our movie viewing area ready with lots of blankets and pillows.  My big girls have taken after me in that they can't really sit and watch a movie without doing something else.  It drives Jason somewhat crazy that I can't just sit and watch the movie.  I either iron or cross stitch or play suduko or solitaire or SOMETHING.  Not tonight though- I was too worn out from my week of single parenting! Abbey is playng games on her iPod, Maddie is sewing and Naomi is simply enthralled with the movie.  

It was a way quick 19 hours, but much fun!  

What are some of your favorite family day activities if you are staying inside?

The problem with tomorrow...

Does God teach you through themes?  That's how He seems to work in my life. Maybe He knows I'm THAT thick headed that He has to come at me from a lot of different directions for something to sink in, but that seems to be how it typically works.  I hear something somewhere- maybe a sermon, maybe even just a casual conversation with a friend, then I read a devotion along the same lines, then I read something in the Word to confirm what I'm hearing, then I hear it again somewhere else and on and on it goes until I finally I realize, "oh! maybe I should be paying attention here..."

And by the way, just a warning, this is a processing post.  I am processing various things that God has laid on my heart and the end result may not make a lot of sense, but I'm processing and that's usually when God teaches so I'm trying to listen while I write and you're welcome to come along for the ride.  Just don't be disappointed if you get to the end and think, WHAT is she saying here?  Most likely, I'm not sure yet...

I've been thinking a lot about the concept of "today" as opposed to "tomorrow" as it relates to being a good steward of whatever thing God has entrusted me with at any given point.  Is that clear as mud?  I've had these 2 recurring themes in my mind lately and I'm seeing them beginning to converge.

First- being faithful with what God has entrusted to me.  His Word, His message, the lives of my kids.  These are BIG DEAL things.   I've been in James 4:13-17 where it talks about not knowing where we'll even be today or tomorrow (yeah, we can just a little bit relate to that- 14 something moves in 17 years of marriage...) but simply being in the Lord's will, and the verse I keep coming back to is verse 17 at the end of this chapter...

"Anyone, then, who knows the good he ought to do and doesn't do it, sins." 

James 4:17

So he goes from talking about not knowing what the future holds and therefore doing God's will by seizing the NOW and living in TODAY, to not boasting about our own plans, to reminding us that not only is DOING wrong sinful but NOT doing something right is also sinful.  Huh.  I need to unpack this a lot more, but for now I am looking at how this applies to my role as mom/wife/organizer of our home.  

Here's where the problem with tomorrow comes in, and the second theme that's been running around in my head- today vs tomorrow.    If I know of something good that I need to do TODAY, whether it be something as simple as spending 30 quality minutes of reading time with Naomi or something that takes a little more brain power like working on a story I'm memorizing in Arabic, if the Spirit leads me to do that thing NOW, TODAY, who am I to offer the excuses of my well laid plans and organizational ideas as an excuse for not doing that thing.  

In other words, if I look at my family chore chart and I see that Tuesday is my day to do the living room vacuuming and dusting myself and scrub all of the long brown hairs off of all of our area rugs (have I mentioned that all females in our house just might have to shave their heads?  Wait.  Never mind) but I feel the Spirit nudging me to spend Anabelle's nap time meditating on a scripture passage or memorizing a story or getting a craft ready for the big girls, am I going to serve my own plans and schedule and be proud of my organizational skills and check off that thing on my list or am I going to set those things aside and LISTEN to God's nudge and OBEY in that moment. 

Immediate obedience is something I'm pretty good at preaching to my kids, but I don't know how well I actually do at it! 

 I'm wondering how many opportunities I've missed because I convince myself that my plans and schedule, none of them BAD in and of themselves, are more important than the interruptions God might bring my way.  I don't want to be guilty of telling God I'll get to something TOMORROW that He has clearly shown me needs to be done TODAY.  

As someone who was in the church every time the doors were opened and then some for as far back as I can remember, I can't exactly leave this topic without referencing Matthew 25 and the parable of the talents.  Of course, those verses have been swimming around in my head too.  I want to be the servant who was "faithful with a few things" so will be "put in charge of many".  I want to be invited to "Come and share your master's happiness." (Matthew 25: 21)  

As I've meditated on these verses,  I come back over and over to the fact that God has entrusted Jason and I with our beautiful daughters and we are to be faithful in our work of discipling them and teaching them the things of Jesus.  These are the "few" things right now that He is requiring me to be faithful with.   And what precious things they are!   These precious ones SEE how I react to the curve balls life throws- the little interruptions that just might be divine appointments.  Do they see me setting aside my plans and joyfully embracing what God might bring our way each day or do they hear me whining about the inconvenience.  Ouch!  Not sure I like the answer to that!  It's so hard to be flexible in the midst of busy- ness!  Thankfully we serve a God who is endlessly patient and tirelessly teaches us from His Word.  To bad it so often takes me oh so long to hear it!  

He has faithfully reminded me this week in the midst of my thinking the job is just too big and I will most surely mess it up, that He is giving me bite sized pieces and I am to faithfully be a steward of one day at a time.  I must pray as Jesus did for my "daily" bread knowing that He is in control of my tomorrows.   How wise of Him to remind us in His Word that tomorrow is not to be worried about.  (Matthew 6) Now If I can just remember to LISTEN!  I am not at all saying tomorrow should not be planned for, just not WORRIED about- that's a big distinction for me!  

My prayer for myself each morning this week has been that I would be faithful with His message today in the lives of my kids and anyone else he brings my way, and that I would not put off until tomorrow anything that the Spirit is leading me to do TODAY.  Even if that means sacrificing my plans and my carefully orchestrated schedule.  

And mainly, AM I BEING A FAITHFUL PRAY-ER FOR MY KIDS?  Nope, not near enough.  Don't think it can ever be enough actually.  In my notes in my Bible on the James 4 passage (yes, I still use a book Bible NOT an electronic one, can't let go of my years of sermon notes and family memories scribbled in the margins!), a sermon I heard referenced 1 Samuel 12 and the fact that FAILING TO PRAY for someone could be a sin.  Lord, let that not be true for me especially in relation to my girls!  I am LISTENING for your voice and I will be ON MY KNEES when you tell me to do be!  

"As for me, far be it from me that I should sin against the Lord by failing to pray for you.  And I will teach you the way that is good and right."

I Samuel 12: 23

So much more I could ramble on about on this topic- I've only scratched the surface of what I feel God is teaching me, but I just looked at the clock which sadly says 12:30 which means that my alarm will be going off in 5 hours.  Sigh.  Yeah, and considering this morning I slept straight through said alarm and woke up to a panicked Abbey telling me we had just missed the bus and why were we all still in bed at 7:30, and then we all ran around like crazy people and got out the door 30 minutes later only to have a flat tire on the way to school and be even later because we sat at the gas station for 30 minutes while they put a straw (? not sure- my Arabic was scratchy on this one...) in the tire during which time we all sang High School Musical songs really loud and thoroughly enjoyed the fact that we were completely mortifying 13 year old Abbey and I reveled in the new discovery that I am now VERY capable of THOROUGHLY embarrassing my eldest.... whew. (are you as tired from reading that sentence as I am from writing it?  that was the point...)

Learning to live in the moment... be careful what you pray for!

"Devote yourselves to prayer, being watchful and thankful.  And pray for us, too, that God may open a door for our message, so that we may proclaim the mystery of Christ, for which I am in chains.  Pray that I may proclaim it clearly, as I should.  Be wise in the way you act toward outsiders; make the msot of every opportunity.  Let your conversation always be full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone." 

Colossians 4: 2-6