Barbie meets June Cleaver

There have been various times in my illustrious parenting career that I have found myself taken off guard by one thing or another in regards to convictions that other people think I should have about what is right and/or wrong for my girls to do/watch/read play with at any given time.  The trends constantly seem to be changing and quite honestly, it's kind of hard to keep up!

Now, I honestly don't know if this is because we live overseas and are somewhat out of the loop, or if it's because I am, well, me.  I do on occasion miss things that may be glaringly obvious to the rest of the world.

Let's pretend that it's because we live overseas.  At least that makes me feel better.

Anyway, there have been times when we've returned to the states for a season that it's taken me (and the girls) a while to catch up with what's what.  There is a certain beauty to naivety as I talked about in this post about helping our girls hang on to their innocence, but it can also be overwhelming to return "home" and not be at all in the know about current trends.

Jason can definitely relate more to this than I can, having grown up overseas in a time where internet did not exist, and their communication with family in the states involved recorded cassette tapes mailed back to the states from Africa every few months.  Here's a perfect example from his childhood ...  His family returned to America in 1986 for his 6th grade year.  He had no idea who Michael Jackson was. In 1986.  Not good for a preteen boy trying hard to blend in and not stand out!

As dangerous as the internet can be for our little ones, it does help keep us connected that's for sure and for that I am thankful!  My girls biggest "well don't I feel out of it moment" involved coming home from the first week of school and wondering who in the world was Ole Miss and WHAT was the SEC?  I can live with that!

I'm talking more about parenting trends.  There have been a few things over the years that I have found myself caught in an awkward situation for recommending or talking positively about a toy or TV show that I had no clue that a large majority of Christians in America were avoiding or sometimes even boycotting for one reason or another.  Usually due to some news story or pop-culture event that I was completely unaware of.

Disney Princess movies, Harry Potter books, Hannah Montana to name a few...

Barbie is another good example.   I remember being somewhere in the states with Abbey and Maddie when they were younger (maybe a birthday party, a church event- I'm really not sure).  In the course of the conversation I referred in some way to Barbie's and looking for a particular item related to Barbie and being thankful that it was so much cheaper in the states.  Several of the ladies in the group commented to me that their girls were not allowed to play with Barbie and that was that.  I remember thinking, "huh..."  "okkkaaaaay" and wondering what I was missing.

I have since seen plenty of scantily clad Barbie's to know that yes, there could be an issue there, possibly especially in a home where there are young boys along with the young girls.

That's not the point for this post though.  

I was helping the girls clean up their Barbies recently (yes, we still shamelessly play them- ok more Naomi and Anabelle now but still) and as I was putting the clothes away, I realized that I really want to showcase WHY it never crossed my mind that Barbie is inappropriate or even anywhere close to scandalous.

It's because, thanks to my amazing Memommy, my Barbie's (yes, MINE, they have been passed on to my girls), tend to look more like June Cleaver as opposed to Britney Spears.

When I was little, Memommy made me a whole wardrobe of Barbie clothes fashioned after the current styles and she made another batch a few years ago for my girls.  Those are the clothes I grew up dressing Barbie in.  I didn't know anything else, and really, neither have my girls.

The clothes are starting to show a little wear (not surprising as some are close to 30 years old!) and I wanted to be sure to record these beautiful dresses and Memommy's amazing talent.

(I am obviously a horrible photographer and yes, Barbie's hair is way out of control...  Focus on the outfits please)

These are some of my favorites.  Possibly because growing up, Memommy also made a lot of my clothes and clothes for my aunts and my mom, and so these outfits remind me of those.

Several of us had something in the navy blue with the white bows.

The dress I wore to my 6 year birthday party was made out of this rainbow fabric.  I think my mom and aunt also had skirts (or dresses?)

The detail she put into all these clothes is amazing!  Almost all of them have snap closures and some sort of detail work like extra lace or extra pearl buttons like on this one...

One of my all time favorites was the Barbie wedding gown that Memommy made.  Complete with a separate slip underneath and a matching veil (this veil is actually the one she made for my girls but mine was similar)

She's dressed in the wedding gown made for me, and the one I'm holding is the one made for the girls...

Showing the separate slip underneath...

Don't worry, Barbie was also well prepared in the PJ department...

Did you have these full length nightgowns growing up?

I had matching ones for each of these, but this was my favorite...

Again, I love the detail!

Also, a cozy robe (including pockets) for winter nights...

This next group of dresses is probably what led me to the June Cleaver analogy...

I love them down to the pearl buttons and lace necklines...

And Barbie should always be prepared with good outerwear, don't you think?

She has a versatile full length cape as well as a shorter version.  

If it's really cold, she has a stylish winter coat with an attached matching scarf.

(by the way, Jason just came and looked over my shoulder and commented that it's "freaky" to have all these pics of Barbies- again, the point is the hand made clothes!  If I had itsy bitsy Barbie sized hangers or some other way to display, I would.  Work with me here...)

Barbies in our house can still dress up for a night on the town too.

Here are some of my favorites...

Pretty sure I had a Christmas dress made from the plaid on the left.

I've always loved this one, right down to the satin pink accent ribbon that ties over her shoulders.  Can you see the triangular shape of the hem around the bottom?

This is a 2 piece outfit with individually sewn on beads for decoration.  Hard to believe it's lasted 30 years!!

And not to worry, Barbie could also dress down, 70s/80s style. 

Warm ups and flare let pants...

Meticulously sewed down to the last detail...

(even pleats down the front!)

We have quite a selection of mix and match skirts and blouses.  Again, with incredible detail.  

These are some of my favorites also, because of the fabrics that remind me of my childhood, and because some of these outfits are exactly what I would picture Memommy wearing...

(pretty sure that pearl buttoned shirt with the built in tie around the neck is back in style...but, like I said, I miss a lot of trends so I may be wrong...)

I could be wrong, but I'm fairly certain that this outfit was made to look just like a dress that my Aunt Ginny had when I was little.  It's one of my favorites too..

And no 80s Barbie wardrobe would be complete without a pair of coullotes (does anyone know how to spell that?) and a skirt and blouse of matching floral fabric...

And the grand finale?  What wardrobe is complete without a pretty, versatile apron that can be slipped on over any outfit?

As you can see, I wasn't "missing" anything in my friends innocent remark that her kids weren't allowed to play Barbies.  I have since observed enough in retail Barbie aisles to know that there is definitely a good amount of inappropriate Barbie clothing.  I wasn't missing anything, I was just exposed to a different Barbie world.  One where Barbie's clothing was tasteful, versatile and just plain fun for any little girl to play with.  

So don't worry moms, if you send your little girls to our house to play with our little girls, they may be exposed to Barbies  (let me know if you don't want them to!), but it's a different breed of Barbie over here.  She's tastefully covered and fashionably dressed in outfits created by my incredibly talented Memommy.  I guarantee you won't find doll clothes like these anywhere else!

Stay tuned for pics of our homemade American Girl doll clothes.

(maybe those pictures won't be quite as freaky?)

13 going on...

FOURTEEN, people.  14.  Not 30, not 25, heck, not even 18.  When your baby girl is 13 (as mine is for only one more day), at that particular point in time she is 13 going on 14.  So why can't we just let that be?!

Why is society and/or culture today (particularly in America in my opinion) insisting that our girls grow up so quickly?  What is it that makes us push them towards the grown up world at breakneck speed?   I really don't know.  I don't have answers here but I think more of us should be asking the question.

If you're a regular reader of this blog, you know that our family lives and works in the Middle East.  Now there are a lot of things about Arab culture in general that can be challenging.  Mainly things that are just DIFFERENT and therefore hard.  For example: lines and the idea of waiting in them in an orderly fashion.... Not gonna happen!  And just give up on getting frustrated about it and pitching your own little mini-fit in the grocery store when the 84th person breaks in front of you.  They are not going to notice your mini-fit and if they do notice, they will probably have no idea what you're upset about (unless they've spent time in the West).  Another example would be the concept of saving face and truth telling.  In many situations in this culture it is vastly more important for someone to "save face" so to speak and tell you what they know you want to hear as opposed to actually telling you the truth.  Not necessarily about large issues, but in day to day functioning this particular nuance of the culture can be highly irritating!  

So yeah, anyone who has spent time in a culture other than their own, can attest to the fact that there are things that take getting used to.   And, although it may take more time, as I think we just naturally are more prone to notice the things that bug us, the more time you spend in another culture, the more certain things about that culture become endearing to you, even part of who you are.

So while there may be many things that our Arab neighbors don't get quite right, especially in the opinion of Westerners, I feel like they are doing a pretty good job with daughters.   Now to clarify, I am NOT talking here about M'slim views on women, various practices related to young girls that are horrifying, or any aspect of society that says women are lesser creatures.  I am simply talking about the face that from our interaction with other Arab families, from my daughters interactions with friends at school and my relationships with mothers of those friends, I feel like, in general, the girls in this part of the world are free to be, well just girls (as opposed to women) for longer than girls in the states.  And maybe I'm completely off base in that synopsis, I don't know.  But that's really not the point so please don't get stuck on it.   The point is, WHY do we want them to grow up so quickly?!

WHY do I see pictures of girls Abbey's age on facebook or various blogs dressed to go to school functions with, well, TEENAGE BOYS, and the girls are wearing shorter skirts and lower cut blouses than I ever remember even thinking about wearing.  I'm talking about 12 and 13 year old GIRLS here.   And it's usually the moms that post the albums with cute little comments like "she's growing up so fast" or "13 going on 30".  Help me understand why.   I don't live in America anymore.  Maybe I'm missing something?  What are moms thinking when their little girls are dressed up well beyond their years?  Or maybe the better question is, "what are the dad's thinking?" !?!?!   Dad's who were once teenage boys themselves and know good and well that that the boys out there interacting with their daughters cannot help but thinking more than how cute she looks...

What's the rush?!  I guess that's what I'm saying.  SAVOR the innocence!  Cling to it.

I'm kind of talking in circles here.  I know that.  My baby will be 14 tomorrow and I'm in denial.  Life happens just way to fast.  Of course, I'm not saying that we should fight against the natural progression into maturity.  Whether I think it's too fast or not, it IS the way God created it to be for a reason.  So certain things that are inevitable I must embrace.  We take hold of the teaching moments that are naturally brought into our paths as parents of daughters.  But isn't it possible to do that while at the same time allowing them to maintain their innocence for just a bit longer?   Do we have to allow them to bear so much of their outer beauty that their inner beauty becomes scarred beyond repair?  Can't we do something to turn around the trends of what "everyone else" is doing?  Can we somehow redefine that?  Don't we have a responsibility as reasonable parents and adults who can think a bit more clearly to redefine what is normal?

Yes, I want to prepare my girls for the things that they will likely be bombarded with out there in the "real world".   I strive for them to be well spoken and educated, able to carry on intelligent conversations with both a 7 year old, a 77 year old and all ages in between.  We don't hide them from the realities both tragic and lovely that make up todays world.  You know what I want to hide them from quite honestly?  The American teenage culture!   From what I read and hear lately, it is a very scary place!!   The average age of exposure to porn is 10.  TEN!!  That's not even teenage.  And that's just the tip of the iceberg of the issues being dealt with.  So HOW do we cling to those last bits of innocence as our little princesses grow into women?  How when "because everyone else dresses this way" is the least of our worries with the internet at their fingertips...   May seem overly simplified,  but last time I checked, we ARE still the parents.  We do have a bit of control even if it may be easier in certain circumstances to say that we don't.  There are filters and parental protection programs.  If they want to get to it, they will, you may say.  Maybe.   But don't you also think that they want to know that you care enough to try and prevent it?

When people over here say that a certain country or city is becoming more "western" do you know what they mean?  Essentially they mean that the women are beginning to dress more provocatively.  Yep, that's what they equate with "western".  Women who show skin.  Are we ok with that?  I'm not!  Now, I'm not saying that they stereotype is correct, but it should at least cause us to pause and consider....

So help me here, fellow parents of teens.  How are you fighting this fight?  How can we convince our kids that it's ok to be 13 going on 14, 14 going on 15, 15 going on 16 etc.  Are we asking the right questions?  Are we inserting ourselves appropriately into the lives of our teens in a way that says, "I love you enough to guide you in knowing that this or this is not ok and this or this is?"  Are we accepting cultural norms just because they have become cultural norms and not because they are God's best for our kids?  I'm asking myself too!

Maybe I'm way off on this,  I don't know.  I am after all processing against the backdrop of being emotional about the passing of time.   And by definition, processing means that I have not come to any logical conclusions (as if that weren't already completely obvious by the rambling nature of this post...).

For now, I'm mourning the fact that I'm old enough to have a daughter who'll be 14 tomorrow, and I'm celebrating the beautiful young women she is becoming.

 I'm mourning the fact that she is beginning to notice that their are other members of the opposite sex in her life besides her father, grandfathers, uncles and cousins who might be worthy of her attention, and I'm celebrating that I still have to occasionally remind her to brush her hair before she leaves the house.

 I'm mourning the fact that in 4 short years I won't be putting her on the bus and across the city to high school but on a plane and across the ocean to college, and I'm celebrating that for now, for today, she still loves to play capture the flag with the neighborhood kids and hide-n-seek with her baby sister.

I'm mourning the fact that the sin in our world has brought issues to her attention that I would much rather she didn't know existed, and I"m celebrating her love for reading and new information.

Mostly I think I'm mourning the fact that all of my girls are going to be dealing with this culture that pushes them to be 13 going on 30.  I can't help but think that things aren't going to slow down much.  So as I mourn that reality and think about how if affects each of my girls, I celebrate the fact that as parents we have the choice to say that we do not accept this as the norm for our girls. I will stand against this trend and fight hard for the innocence of my daughters, and I will do everything within my power to help them take life one year, one day, one moment at a time.

Yes, tomorrow my Abbey will no longer be "13, going on 14".  She will actually BE 14.   And the year after that, 15, and then 16.  That is, after all, how it works.  And I accept that.  I do.  Let's just agree to help our daughters, our sons, be the age that they are, and be all there.  God, in His infinite knowledge, did not design 30 to come after 13 for a reason.  Let's help keep it that way.

" He has made everything beautiful in its time.  He has also set eternity in the hearts of men; yet they cannot fathom what God has done from beginning to end.  I know that there is nothing better for men than to be happy and do good while they live.  "

Ecclesiastes 3:11-12

Leaving Impaired

In exasperation, my sweet husband called me this the other day- leaving impaired that is.  I pretended to be quite offended while knowing deep down inside how very ridiculously true this statement is.  It was in the midst of (or towards the end of as we were actually walking out the door at the time) a typical last minute rush around to leave for our weekly fellowship.

Diapers were flying through the air to pack the diaper bag, doors being slammed to close off the area for Mia.  Everyone talking at once.  Were you a fly on the wall, you would hear..

 "who's got the sippy cup"  "does anyone have Lovey?"  "girls, don't forget your Bibles!"  "did anyone feed the dog?"  "Naomi did you get your Bible coloring book?" "WHY OH WHY are the wipes NEVER in the same place?" "WHO TOOK MY HAIRBRUSH AGAIN?!!?"  "Maddie, you DO realize we are walking out the door?" "People, PLEASE turn out the lights, every light in this house is on...."  and on and on in goes.  Finally, we step out the door and onto the elevator, everyone mostly in one piece, and Jason looks at me and with all the tact in the world says,

"YOU are leaving impaired"

And I'm pretty sure he didn't mean it as a compliment...

(and can I mention here that it didn't help my case at all when we got downstairs and I had to run back up to get my phone I'd forgotten- typical....)

It is almost physically impossible for me to get to any given event on time.  Something about the planning of how much time it's going to take to get our crew out the door and the estimation of how much time we should allow- something about that calculation just really never works for me.

I try.  TRULY I do.  Sad part is, it doesn't make it much better to say how much I try to respect my husband's desire to be on time when I seem to fail so miserably at it every time!  

WHY is this so difficult for me? (and many other members of the female race I might add...) I KNOW I'm not the only one out there who struggles with this!  Anybody have any tips for how to get better?  

I must add that this is not a new thing for me though.  It's been a struggle my whole life.  I was actually suspended in high school for tardies- HA!   My home room teacher lost count after 46 and decided she couldn't overlook it anymore.  Bless her heart, she must have been a kindred leaving impaired soul and was trying to show me a little love!)

And poor Jason.  It's not just me.  He has 5 females in our house who have to get ready.  Despite our best efforts, it just never all seems to come together.  The girls and I often share sheepish glances while apologizing profusely to Daddy that we are once again late.  This is one (of many I'm sure) area in which I am a horrible role model to our girls.  So girls, do as Daddy says, not as Mommy does-

BE ON TIME!  

To hear him tell it, he's been fighting this battle his entire life.  We are actually not allowed to say "coming" when he asks if we're almost ready thanks to one of his younger sisters, who apparently was always "coming" as they were heading out the door but never seemed to actual come...  

(funny side note, Anabelle has started saying "coming" whenever we call her.  She'll stop what she's doing and say "coming" and come running.  I guess it's ok for her though (at least for now) since she actually does come)

I'm thankful for my man who has likely given up on this battle but after 20 year together has not given up on me.  

Keep fighting, honey.  We may just get it together one of these days, and what a happy day it would be!  Please know that we are trying!  (even if knowing that actually makes it worse...)

Playmobile!

With the busiest shopping time of the year approaching, I thought I'd do a plug for some of my all time favorite toys.  You wouldn't think that apartment living with 4 girls would equal me liking toys that if a bazillion little pieces but I absolutely love Playmobile sets.  They are truly fabulous.

We first discovered Playmobile almost 10 years ago when we lived in France.  There was a little suburb of Paris that had a massive Playmobile warehouse type place.  (picture the inside of Sams or Costco).  Every playmobile set in existence was set up around the perimeter with big bins of all the pieces and you could go in and let the kids play for as long as you wanted.  Of course the catch was that going in and out, you walked through the retail store with your kids who had just played with all of these amazing toys.  They had an area with refreshments for the parents to sit while the kids played and played with these super cool toys.  Pretty cook sales gimmick if you ask me.  Anyway, that Christmas we started our playmobile collection with the grocery store.  SUCH a cool toy (see pictures below).  The great part is that all the sets mix and match.  You can get the bigger dollhouse or grocery store type sets or smaller ones- ice cream parlor, beauty shop etc.  There's a ton of them really.  I know nothing about all the boy ones but I"m sure they are just as awesome as all the princess, fairy sets.

Naomi rediscovered our Playmobile house the other day and had so much fun setting it up and arranging everything just so.  Aren't all the details fun?  Down to the bottles of laundry detergent on the washing machine!

She's even got the mailman putting mail in the mailbox and if you look closely, you can see the Dad sitting in his recliner by the TV...

This has provided hours of playtime for at least 3 days in a row now- and she is only playing with one of our sets!

Not pictured are our fairy sets, princess sets (although she did use some of the princess pieces in the house), animal sets and grocery store.

Here is a post I did a few years ago that pictures more of the toys along with some of our other favorite things.  And even with a toddler in the house, I just can't say enough good things about these toys! 

Redefining...

Writing is therapy for me.  I know my grammar is, well, bad.  And my spelling?  Not so great either.  Maybe that's because my writing has typically been for me and Jesus.  I am now and always have been a journaler(see, case in point- my spell check is yelling at me but how else do you say that?  Is journaler not a word?!).  Me and God figure stuff out (well me, I guess he already has it figured out), but I figure stuff out in the process of writing things out.  I've discovered since starting this blog that I typically just get around to posting the family pictures, the "what's happening around here" kind of post, but there's all this other stuff swimming around in my head.  Thoughts on this or that issue.  Irritations about certain things, rants about who knows what...  Things that typically are reserved for the pages of my journals have become blog posts in my head...   Occasionally a bit of my more of my "journaly" side will leak out here but it's usually just the fluff of our lives.  And by fluff, I DON'T mean unimportant.  It's all important.  Every picture and every memory recorded is important.  I guess by fluff  I mean the stuff that's easy to share.  I don't very often dig very deep in what I actually end up writing.  

I've been wondering why.   Am I afraid of offending?  Definitely.  Am I a pleaser who wants everyone to agree with everything that I say always?  Oh yes.  Am I beginning to recognize that that is completely and totally ridiculous? yep.  So why am I fearful of expressing my thoughts, my fears, my lessons learned through the path God has me on?  Not sure yet.    A few theories though..

There's this whole school of thought out there questioning why anyone would bare their soul for all of cyber world to see.  I've listened to that (idea) in the past  but I don't think I really see it that way anymore. I want this to be more than photo memories and traveling adventures but a safe place to write and share  the things God puts on my heart.  I don't know if anyone's listening or not and I don't know if that's really the point.   I mean, yeah, it's encouraging when someone comments or someone else "follows" because you realize that you are making connections, but I think the point is more in expression.  Safely expressing (if you are a non- verbal processor like me you will know what I mean here by safely...  you can write your thoughts, then delete your thoughts, then re-write your thoughts again and again and all the while, NO ONE verbally responds and tells you your silly or wrong or slightly crazed ) .  Anyway, you can safely express your emotions, thoughts, experiences in a way that communicates to others and maybe in some way encourages someone out there who can say, "YES!" "What she said!"  I mean, how many time have you read someone's blog and thought, "wow, I wish I had said it that way- that is exactly what I was thinking!".   

The other big fear revolves around being wrong and a lifelong habit of avoiding confrontation at all costs.  Yeah, I don't like to be wrong and I definitely don't like to confront or be confronted.  (just ask my husband)  So the idea of writing my thoughts about things that I"m probably quite often WRONG about or things that others will simply disagree with me about is a bit intimidating.  But, come one.  We're all human, therefore we're all wrong, A LOT!  And God definitely didn't use the same cookie cutter mold when he made us so we are quite likely to disagree on occasion.  I"m becoming more and more ok with that.  So I am surrendering this fear. I am ready to be wrong.  And I'm ready to be confronted. (sort of) In writing.  

So, all that to say, I'm going to start putting myself "out there" a little more.  I'm going to share a bit more of my personal "stuff" because in seeing this blog as an opportunity to journal my life, I want it to be the full picture.  The good, the bad, and the oh so ugly.    There.  I've said it.  I've edited it (a little but not too much- still want to be real).  So now I'm committed to it.   Writing more.  Expressing more.  Offending more?  I hope not, but possibly.   

And to be clear- this (all that I've just expressed...) is my heart's desire.  Keeping more of a record of God's lessons for me through this crazy life journey.  There will definitely be periods of silence because, let's be real, I just don't have it that together yet and I'm coming from an extremely exhausted, sleep deprived place (see next post-- hopefully coming tonight nope tomorrow, this one took too long...), but this is my goal and I"m putting it out there for all to see.  Maybe someone will hold me to it?  Regardless, I just wanted to redefine a bit of what my posts might look like.   Because for whatever reason,  for me the process of putting my thoughts down onto paper a blog for all the world to see (?) is therapeutic.  And healing somehow. In the process of writing, I almost always learn something that God has been trying for days, weeks, sometimes months to pound into my thick skull,  so I do hope you'll stick around for this new season of Pink Laundry.   

Back to life, back to reality (and hopefully back to blogging...)

Wow!  I managed a 3 month silence!  That was not my intent at all for the summer.  I really thought (hoped) that I would have a decent amount of time for writing but that did not prove to be the case.  I had loads of time for family, fun, language study, travel, travel again.  Not actually sure where I thought writing was going to fit into all that but somehow I thought I would.

So the purpose of this post is to say, "no, I have not fallen off the face of the earth" (although there were times in the craziness of this summer that I thought I/we might!).  I'm here.  With lots of topics swimming around in my head to write about.  God has really impressed upon my heart recently that writing is something I really want to do more of so I'm hopeful that I'll be able to do that with the school year back upon us and things (hopefully) not quite so crazy.  Of course as I sit here, Anabelle as rubbing kidney beans from her taco soup in her hair, she just hurled her milk cup to the floor (and yes, got rebuked especially since she stared at me defiantly while doing it), and she is yelling "i, i, i" at the top of her lungs and pointing at the freezer (thank you babysitter in Lebanon for introducing her to ice!!).  How exactly do you teach a 16 month old not to yell the same thing repeatedly for what seems like hours on end?!  Anyway, all that to say, who knows how the new desire to write more will play out, but I'm hopeful.  (And can I just say, that I have the cutest 16 month old in. the. world.  Even though 30 seconds ago she was driving me crazy with her request for ice, she's now melting my heart and she leans over and in her sweet little voice says "hewoaa Meema"  (hello Mia) to our puppy who stands faithfully under her chair for every meal for reasons I don't need to explain.  She's also gnawing on an apple and every few seconds holds it up to me and says, "appa, ummmm Mommy"- In other words I like this apple, Mommy!).

So here we are, back at home.  Just because I feel the need to justify a wee bit my silence, here's an idea of how our summer has gone.  Maybe I'll do a "summer in pictures" post at some point but for now, I just wanted to get something out there- anything- to keep the blogging procrastination from going on any longer.   We spent a wonderful 30 days in America split between Georgia family, Florida vacation and Memphis and Mississippi family.  It was all amazing.  We came back home for 6 days (barely long enough to get over jet lag and unpack our bags...).  Anabelle literally had one good night of sleep before we were off again..  We repacked our bags for another month (have I ever mentioned how much I DETEST packing and un-packing...) and headed to Lebanon for a month of intensive Arabic study for Jason and I.  Since that's where we started our Arabic study, we went back to a school and dialect we're familiar with.  We also wanted to give the girls a chance to say goodbye to Lebanon since when we left 2 years ago we really weren't sure where we would be moving.  We were blessed to be able to stay in the home of some friends who are currently in the states so it's not like we were hotel living for a month.  We returned from Lebanon on a Friday, on Saturday and Sunday we bought school supplies, school books and uniforms, on Monday we left for a week down in Aqaba on the coast as kind of a last hurrah before the school year started back.  We returned Thursday morning, took Anabelle to the ER twice in 4 hours for a nasty case of croup, finished unpacking on Friday and Saturday and the girls started school on Sunday- wheeww!  It's been quite a summer!

Would love to hear how your summer's been and I promise not to be silent for so long.  Time to go clean the taco soup off my sweet baby.  Thankfully "meema" has done a pretty good job of the floor.  And since I can't do a post without pictures here are my babies on their 1st day of school yesterday..

AJ- 8th grade

Maddie Moo- 6th

Nominus- 1st

The whole gang..

Sleeptalking and an uncanny ability to lose and/or forget

By the time Abbey was around 3 or 4 there was kind of a general consensus among family and pretty much anyway who knew me as a child that she was and is my spitting image.  I don't necessarily always see it unless I look at pictures but what I do see is how much she is also like me in her actions.  I don't think there will ever be an issue of me not "getting" her.  I was thinking about this just the other day when I was lecturing here about something she left at school (thinking something to the effect of how my mom would be rolling her eyes if she could only hear me now!).  Anyway, although Abbey is definitely more like me in both appearance and demeanor, she pulled a big time Jason the other night (with a little hint of Kelli as well).

The big time Jason that she pulled relates to sleep behavior...  So Jason would probably argue this point but he is definitely the king of weird sleep behavior in our home.  He thinks that I have my share of odd sleep behavior but as the one writing this post, we're just going to stick with the facts which are that he is king.  His parents tell stories of Jason and his brother talking to each in French as kids.   There was the time in college that he woke up standing in the 2 foot square space between his bunk bed, his dresser, and the wall.  There was the time shortly after we got married that he bolted up in bed and yelled "what the HE$%## is that?!" pointing at his grandparents armoire (we were staying the weekend with them).  Another time in our newlywed days, I woke up to a weird sound and saw him down at the foot of our queen size bed attempting to pull the bed across the floor and "get us out of the way".  In our early marriage days, I tried for a while to keep a notebook by my bed so I could write down all the wacky things he said in the middle of the night.  It doesn't happen as often now although he does occasionally plan meetings or give taxi directions (in Arabic) in his sleep...  Occasionally he goes on business trips and stays with a colleague and lets just say there is a never a shortage of "guess what Jason did in his sleep last night" stories...

So last night a good hour after Abbey had gone to bed, she comes wandering into the living room with a very glazed over look mumbling something about her retainer and brushing her teeth.  I told her she was asleep and sent her back to bed.  Well, this morning she woke up and couldn't find her retainer anywhere. We looked all through the sheets and around on the floor.  I reminded her about coming into the living room but she had no remembrance.  We figured she must have removed her retainer in her sleep for some random reason.  Thankfully she has a back up and I really didn't think much more about it.

Moving on to the "hint of Kelli" in Abbey's little routine last night.  See, I seem to occasionally have a wee bit of trouble keeping up with things (Jason might describe this in slightly different terms..).  Anyway keys and cell phones seem to be the most challenging for me for whatever reason.  I think I almost have a sickness.  Would you believe I have even managed to lock myself out of the house WITH a key in my possession?!  (Naomi had put the spare key in the other side of the lock and apparently a key won't work when there is a key in the other side... who knew?!)  I'm telling you, I'm cursed!   The most annoying part to Jason (understandably...) is when we are rushing out the door and everything has to come to a halt while I find my keys.  You would think after almost 17 years of marriage I would have found a solution to this!!  Nope..  Jason's favorite example of my key sickness is the time I lost my keys during our newlywed days.  I was frantically searching as I was on my way to a nursing clinical and getting frighteningly close to being late because I couldn't find my stupid keys.  Anyway, long story short- I found them in the freezer.  Beside the ice trays.  See, I had gone for a run the evening before, came in to get a glass of water, set the keys down by the ice trays while I got my drink- perfectly logical!

So this evening the girls were going about their evening chores and Maddie was filling the ice trays.  All of a sudden she started cracking up.  I looked over and she was holding up Abbey's retainer!  At some point in her sleepwalking stupor last night, Abbey stuck her retainer in the freezer right beside the ice trays!

The apple doesn't fall far from the tree...

(this is several months old but I couldn't find a recent...)

Accountability update

Well I've survived the first 10 days of dieting/exercising/organizing my life/weaning my last baby/trying to get up at the crack of dawn...  Yeah, a lot to try and accomplish at once I guess but my hope has been that it will be kind of cyclical and that each thing will help make the other things easier to do.  For example, weaning Anabelle finally allows me to diet and will enable me to have more energy to exercise which will help me diet which will give me more energy to organize my life, oh and hopefully in the midst of all of that Anabelle starts sleeping well again which enables me to get up at the crack of dawn... whew!!  So this update may not be that interesting to the general public, but it's helping me keep track ...

DIETING: Have I mentioned I HATE dieting?  See, I'm really a big fan of all things food so the whole dieting thing kind of poses a problem.  However, a few years ago I discovered South Beach was a plan that I could do for about 2-3 weeks and get an extra few pounds off pretty easily.  I've actually never really had to diet much (even after kids- well at least the first 3) until I hit 35 and my metabolism took a hike.  That was a really depressing day.  Then I had a baby at almost 37 and well, it's been all downhill from there!  So anyway after 10 days of no sugar, no carbs (and essentially no cheats) the fact that I am still sane is a major victory.  I planned to also give up diet coke (or at least severely cut back to 1 or 2 a week) but I decided that was maybe not the best idea during the early stages of the diet especially with Jason being out of town.  Here's why...

This is what everyone else had for dessert...
(click here for this yummy recipe)

This is what I had for dessert...

I'm eating tons of veggies and I feel SO MUCH better overall.  I've lost 4 pounds- was hoping for more by this time but I'll take it.

EXERCISE:  Have exercised almost everyday but 2 in the last 10 days.  Combination of Jillian Michaels and some weight training/cardio DVD's that I have.  I never really thought exercise would be an issue as I've always loved it- the biggest thing is finding the time for it!  But a Jillian DVD is just the right length- Anabelle will stay happy in her pack -n-play for me to get a whole workout in.

ORGANIZING MY LIFE:  That's actually going very well!  I've gotten the girls chore charts organized finally which I'm thrilled about (them, not so much...).  Will post about that later because I'm very pleased with the way it's going.  I'm getting my own life organized too- time for email, time for finances, time for language study.

WEANING MY LAST BABY: (sniff, sniff)  Going well.  Only nursing first thing in the morning and right before she goes to bed.  Started out kind of shaky as she would drool all the milk out and then throw the cup but I think we are getting the hang of it, and I hope to have her fully weaned within the next two weeks.

GETTING UP AT THE CRACK OF DAWN: (Kendra, are you reading?  do you know what I was tempted to put in that phrase?)  Ok sorry.  That's going ok.  The good news is, Anabelle is finally sleeping better.  She still occasionally wakes up during the night but puts herself back to sleep.  Realistically, I probably shouldn't expect myself to be able to do this while Jason is on a 10 day trip and we've also got 2 other girls staying with us but I at least want to start moving in the right direction which I'm doing so that's good.  I still savor those early morning hours before anyone else in the house is awake and those have been hard, if not impossible to come by lately.  Little by little they are coming back though and I'm thankful for that.

My main goal in all of this if for my life and that of my family to be more glorifying to Jesus.  I'm trying to keep my expectations realistic for this phase  of my life and honestly I think that's the hardest part of the whole thing especially now that our world is so connected and there are SO MANY others out there in the blogosphere and Facebook world and Pinterest world for me to compare myself to (but that's a subject for another post...).  Anyway, my daily prayer in all of this is that my goals will be centered in Him and that I will see my progress (or lack thereof) in any given area through His eyes.

"Many are the plans in a man's heart, 

but it is the Lord's purpose that prevails."

Proverbs 19:21

Accountability?

It's probably not fair to ask the blog world to keep you accountable.  Somehow that is probably cheating a little...  I'm gonna do it anyway though.  Or maybe not actually ask the blog world to keep me accountable but just hope that somehow by putting all this stuff/these plans out there- making them public- somehow maybe that will allow me to keep myself accountable.

See here's the deal.  I have this long list (mostly a mental list which is probably the problem), but a long list nonetheless of the things that I need to fix in my life- do a little better (parent, pray, spend time with Jesus), do a little more of (exercise), do a little less of (eat).  So anyway, there's this list.  And today I'm putting it out there.  Putting myself out there really.  These are my plans for the next two months.  My life improvement plan effective immediately.  In my mind, it's all going to work out so perfectly.  We'll see.

Here's what's going to happen starting this week.  

Begin weaning Anabelle 1 daytime feeding per week so that by her first birthday she if fully weaned.  (sniff, sniff)

Exercise 4-5 times/week

Begin phase 1 of south beach diet and lose 10 pounds in the first month (see mental lists are a bit optimistic- we'll see if that actually happens)

Work towards healthier eating as a family and lost total of 20 pounds by summer vacation

finish organizing family budget

finish organizing girls' chore charts

finish organizing my life (whew!  this may or may not happen but I promised myself I'd put it out there- will let you know what I come up with...)

begin sleeping better at night since Anabelle will be weaned and will therefore sleep better and since I will be exercising and eating right and will therefore sleep better all resulting in me being able to get up at the dreaded 5 o'clock hour for much needed time with Jesus.

See that's what it all kind of comes down to is that I need more time with Jesus!  I'm hoping all these things will result in that!!  Sadly I see only one way to make that happen more effectively.  And considering the amount of sleep I am getting these days (next to none), it pains me a lot to say what I need to do,but God has laid it very clearly out there for me in the way that only God does.  So anyway this horribly painful thing that I need to start doing is getting up A LOT earlier.   As in the 5 o'clock hour.  Actually thanks to my awesome husband, I had a "me date" at Starbucks for like 4 hours a few weeks ago and the biggest thing I came away with is that I need to be getting up earlier...  YUCK!  Anyway, I used to kind of be a morning person.  I've always loved those early hours when the house is still quiet and calm.  Those are precious hours with Jesus and they haven't been happening and they need to happen again.  Yes, I have lots of excuses.  Yes, Anabelle is waking me up multiple times a night.  But also, yes, I choose to stay up late and watch this or that DVD or read this or that blog.  Choices.  I make them and I can adjust them so that things happen the way they need to.

So these are my plans.  I know that my plans are not always His plans, but I am hoping that since my heart's desire is to honor Him with my life and that of my family, that He will help me/guide me in bringing these plans to pass.  Lord give me strength to exercise, willpower to eat right and fabulously multiplied rest!  And if any of you out there feel so inclined to ask me how these things are going I promise not to bite your head off!

Tiger Nation

As a disclaimer, if you've stumbled across this post hoping to find an expert review of Tiger basketball or even a somewhat knowledgeable discussion of what to expect from the team in weeks to come with March Madness upon us, you might want to just keep on going- that's not what you'll find here.  What you will find is a family of true blue fans who live and breathe Tiger basketball as any good Memphis family should- even though we live half a world away...

I'm possibly even more sentimental about the Tigers given that I do live half a world away.  As I sat in my living room this fall and listened to the Tigers game streaming over the internet, I kind of had to stop and check myself and wonder why in the world are there tears streaming down my cheeks just from hearing the fight song?!  Ok, yes, I definitely could have been a little homesick considering that we spent the previous year in Memphis, and as I said before, Tiger basketball is a family affair. I wanted to text my brother or sis-in-law or mom or dad every time Joe Jackson did something amazing or Will Barton hit a 3.  Or I wanted to roll my eyes with my brother when my dad decided he was jinxing the game and should no longer watch, only listen.   Or maybe, considering I had a 4 month old at the time, I was simply hormonal.  Maybe, but doubtful...

Like I said, I was born and raised on Tiger basketball.

NOT University of Memphis Tigers, but Memphis State Tigers.  Dana Kirk, Andre Turner-the little general, Keith Lee, Baskerville Holmes, William Bedford (who was the 5th in that starting line up?).  Then John Wilfong, Vincent Askew- I'm not consulting the internet here- this is all from memory so I'm sure I have some of the timeline messed up!

I remember being as young as 7 or 8 (is that right Dad? John?) and going with my grandparents who had season tickets to the Mid South Coliseum.  My Papa John (not the pizza, that's what we called my granddad long before the pizza)worked for Choctaw and they had season tickets in the folding chairs on the floor, mind you!  6th row on the floor if I remember correctly.  At least in my memory, we went as often as we could and I absolutely loved it.  I remember so clearly the drive down Central avenue following the white Tiger footprints painted on the road.   Saturdays were all about basketball- playing church league in the mornings and then going to cheer on the Tigers in the afternoon/evening.

I guess I'd be lying if I said it was ALL about the basketball for me...  Really, it was/is about the total experience.  I LOVED the Memphis State Cheerleaders- had a poster on my closet door and everything.  In a twisted way I could blame them that I decided to try out for cheerleading in Jr High and high school rather than basketball like Dad wanted me to.  My Dad still insists that I could have played high school basketball...  I'm thinking no but we'll let him think it...

My grandmother Camille was such a cute little fan!  She's definitely a big part of my Tiger basketball nostalgia!   Many times when we couldn't go to the games, we would watch at her house.  Maybe I shouldn't say "we"-  Papa John would get very stressed watching the games and would have to stop as he got older but I remember Grandmother loving every bit of the excitement.  Maybe that's where dad gets his current belief that some games are better off listened to than watched?

Fast forward through high school and college- they weren't so great there for a while but we were still loyal.  The games moved from the coliseum over to the Pyramid- I really don't have memories of those games although I know we went to several.  In college, a large group of us participated in March Madness brackets competitions every year.  No remembrance whatsoever of which years, but I know if the Tigers were in the bracket, I was going to pick them to go all the way- probably not the most logical move especially considering my competitive spirit, but I had to follow my heart!

Now I have my own little family of Tiger fans.  We live overseas so it's kind of hard to follow basketball like we want especially considering our not so great internet connection but we do our best.  In 2008, when the Tigers went all the way to the final, I was up at 3 AM listening to the whole game.  I use the term "listening" somewhat loosely.  What I had to do, was watch the game tracker play-by-play using my oh so slow DIAL UP internet?!  Am I a fan or what?  So I was probably 5-10 minutes behind when the Kansas game slipped away from us during those last minutes but I was oh so proud of my Tigers- even from half a world away.  And, can I just say that that year was and has been the ONLY year that I have ever almost won the bracket contest from college that we still participate in!  I came in second only because the guy who won had picked Kansas to go all the way!  The next year, mom sent us t-shirts so we could feel a little more part of the excitement and so we could being educating our girls on the oh so important topic of being a Tiger fan.  Things like when a game is on and they hear, "da, da da da, da, da, da, da" - they're supposed to say, "Go Tigers Go!"  Important stuff...

We followed from half a world away when Tiger fans were gathering outside Calipari's home in Memphis and protesting his possible departure to Kentucky.  We followed when Pastner came on the scene as head coach.  (this is where I"m going to refrain from any additional commentary as I know little to nothing about coaching ability etc).  I know after a year in Memphis last year following the Tigers in person, that I like him but I can't tell you why as far as coaching ability etc.  He just seems like a good guy (ok, laughter is ok from all you male sports fans, I KNOW being a good guy does not a good coach make...), I'm just saying...  I like him.  Whatever.  I know he must be a pretty decent recruiter as we now have an awesome team of mostly home grown players.  And I like that.  I like that Joe Jackson and that other guy whose name I can't remember right now went to my alma mater.  I like that we have 4 starters who are sophomores so look out, we're going to be around for a while.  I like that if I wanted to get opinions about coaching ability, playing ability etc, all I would have to do is go with my dad down the street to Gibson's donuts some morning and throw out a "how bout them Tigers?" and there would be enough conversation to last through lunch.

Last year we had so much fun being IN MEMPHIS during basketball season.  So fun to cheer on our team with family and friends and remember just how much my town loves my team!  I love that.  I really do.  So there is probably the reason for my tears, my nostalgia.  It's just a good feeling to be a part of a town that rallies around a team.  It really is.  And I know, if you're not from Memphis, you're probably thinking, "uh, Memphis is a bit bigger than a town, right?"  Not so much.  Come visit and you'll discover that it's the biggest small town around, and there's nothing like a little small town pride behind a home team cheering them on.

So once again this year, I've chosen Memphis to go all the way.  It's not a matter of whether they can do it or not- I KNOW they can, Memphis KNOWS they can- we just need to prove it to the rest of the country!
And thank the Lord this year we've moved beyond dial up internet to somewhat highish speed ADSL so hopefully we'll be able to at least listen to and maybe watch...  here's hoping!

(and we'll be stocking up on our Tiger gear this summer, until then this is the best we've got...)

(but she's pretty cute, right?!)

A treasured keepsake

 When Jason and I got married almost 17 years ago, the women in our families gave me a fabulous gift.  They gathered recipes from both of our moms, my grandmothers, and both of our aunts and compiled them in a cookbook for me.  The great thing is that all of the recipes are handwritten by the contributor so I have some precious treasures.  The cookbook also includes personal notes from both of my grandmothers and drawings by my cousins who were 8ish and 11ish at the time.   You can see from the picture that it is very well used and is starting to fall apart.

My cousin Sarah did the drawing in the first picture and this precious drawing that says, "Have a happy honeymoon!"  funny!!

Here's what the pages look like...

I know this gift is somewhat dated.  I mean I guess today it probably would have been put together online in some sort of fancy book, but it is that much more precious to me because it is handwritten and preciously put together.  I love it so much!  So thanks to all the ladies who made this book possible!  I bet you had all forgotten about it.  

Oh and the reason for this post was actually to share a recipe.  My cousin Mary (who was 11ish around the time I got married?) actually contributed a recipe called Cocoa-Mint Yo-yos and I confess that I had never tried it until this Christmas.  I can't believe we've been missing out on this yumminess for all these years!  These little treasures were fabulous- kind of like chocolate mint whoopee pies- so yummy!  

Click here to go to my cooking blog for the recipe

Progress and a weird eye story..

This may be boring to most but for my sanity, I decided to post about our apt progress (or lack thereof...).   Have I mentioned that it's COLD over there?!  Here's Anabelle ready for a day of playing and napping in the cold.  All the rooms have these nice shiny radiators built in but to operate them you have to buy a large amount of diesel that from what I understand is very expensive (around $1000) to fill your tank) and then it doesn't really last that long.  Most people use what are called "sobas" to heat.  We finally bought one this week so we can push it around from room to room and at least keep our area warm.  Anabelle has on three layers, is wrapped in a blanket and her hands and nose are still like ice cubes when she wakes from her nap!  And it's still like 55 or 60 degrees outside!  We're gonna be cold this winter!  This picture was yesterday when Anabelle and I spent most of the day at the apartment organizing and cleaning and Jason spent some of the day.  We still have to make trips back and forth to the house we're still living in to meet the girls school buses so it's hard to get in a good groove for getting a lot done.

Speaking of heat, we had an electrician come yesterday and install our electric water heater in the hall bathroom.

(white tank towards the ceiling)

Yah!  Now we have hot water for all bathrooms and the kitchen!  2 steps forward.

On the same visit the electrician put an extra outlet in our guest bathroom for the washer that Jason installed after removing the bidet.  Unfortunately in that process, he somehow knocked the water hose out of the wall causing water to go everywhere so we still don't have the washer connected...  1 step back..

(yeah, our guest bathroom tile is this weird iridescent silvery black stuff- groovy...)

The electrician also hooked up my gas tank to my stove.  Yah- I can cook!  Question- here's a pic of my stove.  What do you think is intended to go above it?  I hate to waste the space if I could put a shelf or something up there but it seems it would get nasty from being right above the cook top.  It's not deep enough to be for a microwave- thoughts?

Still haven't gotten my mind wrapped around the drawing for Abbey's bed (something else we have to have built by the carpenter).  I"m thinking a medium height loft bed with some shelves underneath and maybe a desk that rolls in and out.  Anyway, AJ and Anabelles' room is still utter chaos.  Maddie and Naomi's pink room is coming together nicely even though it may not look like it from this picture...

Naomi was so happy to have her play mobile grocery store stuff and blocks.  She played play mobile and toy story all afternoon...

Ended the day with a beautiful sunset out our kitchen window...

Had big plans of getting back over there today for another full day of cleaning/organizing.  My stainless steel stove top is rusted, my frig and freezer are growing black mold- lots of other small cleaning jobs as well.  Not to mention no outlets in the other bathrooms or mirrors (usually installed together). 

Anyway, my plans of getting back over there today were thwarted last night when we got home and for about an hour I saw weird zigzaggy lights and rainbows, arches of light and blurry spots.  My first thought was retinal detachment as I had been warned this was possible by my eye doctor in the states.  Jason and I made a trip to the ER (very thankful for dear friends who drove us and whose daughter came to babysit the girls).  No retinal detachment thankfully.  Apparently I had what is called an ocular migraine.  One of the websites I looked at actually said that it can be caused by "emotionally exhausting stress"  hmmm, not me much...  hormone imbalances (nursing a baby).  Anyway, all of this led to my sitting in the waiting rooms of two different retinal specialists, having VERY dilated eyes all day and finally having an area on my left eye lasered to prevent future problems.  Not such a fun day!  And definitely not very productive apt wise!  Oh, and I didn't mention that in the midst of the laser surgery, the machine (yes, the laser machine that was at the time lasering my eye) quit working.  The doctor pitched a fit, we left without paying, went back to her office where I waited for 45 more minutes while she saw patients.  She then gave me a ride to another hospital where we walked in and she took me straight to the laser room (I'm sure it has a different name...) and she finished the procedure.  Enough time had gone by that more drops and goop were applied to my eye.  oof.  Like I said, not such fun...  

Ended the day on a good note though with Thanksgiving meal prep!  Naomi and I hit the streets and went to two different stores to purchase lots of goodies for our meal tomorrow.  We're having a big meal with friends on Friday (schools aren't closed here for Thanksgiving so tomorrow is just a regular day) but we started the tradition in Lebanon of doing our own family meal so I'm cooking a big meal for just us tomorrow.  Yah for Thanksgiving cooking!  Stress relief for me too!!